Mafia Gazette Past Issue 92
The Mafia Gazette Issue 92 For All The News That Is News Wednesday 21st June 'KIDNAP KILLER STALKS CITIES ' By: Helena_Corelli A New York Made Man was seen by several witnesses yesterday in both Las Vegas and Chicago, kidnapping and killing many people from the community. Anyone became a victim of this crazed killer as he stalked through the two cities leaving a trail of blood behind him. The New York based Made who goes by the name of Kush is also known to be the killer of Made Man, Mickey-Ray of Las Vegas who was gunned down after a long and bloody fight that also claimed the lives of 16 bodyguards. Exact numbers of his victims are not yet known, but reports suggest that there may be more than twenty, and some say as many as thirty dead at the hands of Kush. When approached about his actions, the mass-murdering Made refused to comment on the slayings. Other witnesses have come forward however to say that Kush was also seen fleeing the scene of a bank robbery leaving one dead bodyguard behind in his wake, and he has also been seen carrying out muggings in his home city of New York. With the recent war against the NMO, it is rumoured that the kidnapping and killing of his victims is down to the lack of bullets now held by the New York Conceptualists. While their city is still on lockdown, it would appear that at least one of them is out of his city killing everything that he can kidnap. In related news, another Made was killed yesterday evening in New York. Guiseppe_Morello died at the hands of another New York Made, Rosario_Porello. It was reported that after the killing, a very bedraggled individual, almost unidentifiable under the rags and grime, was seen leaving the Morello headquarters. Rumour states that this person had been kidnapped by Morello and held for several weeks. We will bring you more updates as we have them. 'GAZETTE EDITORS FEARED DEAD ' By John Milton In an unusual turn of events, rather than settling into their recently gained posts, new Mafia Gazette editors LiaLombardi and DanteRossi fled the country amidst impending charges of Identity Theft and Fraud. The pair, well known for their thoroughbred stables and penchant for journalism, are believed to have been obtaining funds through deception, aided by their multiple stolen identities. Their plans for this nest-egg are unclear, and it cannot be confirmed at this stage whether authorities have managed to recover the money, or whether it has disappeared with them. The couple were rumoured to have no fewer than nine different passports between them, opening up bank accounts across the country to store their illegally obtained funds in their names. Authorities received several anonymous tips however, believed to be the product of Dante letting one of his identities slip whilst inebriated in a bar with his friends one night. Investigations were swift but thorough, and the pair were quickly on the run after having their passports and many assets seized. After a short spell in custody, they gave local Police the slip, and were last seen headed towards our Central American borders with Mexico, where their car and several items of clothing were recovered in a river not far from the checkpoint. Police warn that these fugitives may still be at large, after possibly faking their own deaths. Though they are not considered dangerous, they are not to be approached by the public if spotted. Authorities instead urge members of the public to contact their local Police departments with any information they may have. Despite their recent turn to the life of crime, the Gazette would like to pay tribute to Dante and Lia for the excellent service they did while at these offices, both as writers and as Editors. No matter what happens to them in the future, they will be missed by all here. 'UNEASY PEACE BREAKS WITH MASSACRE ' By Thisbe Once again, the streets of one of our county’s great cities were disrupted with mass violence and bloodshed. It is rumoured that this was a war of sorts between two notorious mafia families going by the names of The Conceptualists and the LVC. The death toll from this war, which spanned for almost two hours in the normally quiet city Denver and the busier one of Las Vegas, was on a scale unseen for a long time and certainly the largest death count within such a period of time, since the controversial new gun laws were introduced. It is believed that the first death was a man known to work as a bodyguard who died in the call of duty. Quite who his employer was, no one is sure, but certainly with his death, the war escalated into series of deaths and the resulting exchange of shots from people on both sides. The deaths consisted largely of Bodyguards from both sides for a long period but soon bodies began to line up at the morgue with rumours that graveyards were struggling to cope with the sudden rush of bodies. It is believed that The Conceptualists suffered no losses during the attacks while notable deaths on the Las Vegas families’ side included Made Men KrazyTrain and White_Lightning, WiseGuy BlackMagic and CriminalMinded, an Earner before the loss of his Boss. BlackMagic was the first notable death. After husband White_Lightning fled from attackers in Las Vegas and ran to Denver, she followed and after a brief gunfight, was killed at 3:28PM. At 3:52PM husband White_Lightning joined her, he was killed after failing to kidnap Conceptualist leader CarmineMillano several times, it's unclear who fired the fatal shot but rumours are rife that it could well be Chicago Made Man Jacki_Giamatti who was reported to be in the area at the time. After forty minutes, the death of the next high profile name, KrazyTrain, occurred. He joined the battle coming to the aid of his allies and seek vengeance for the loss of friend, White_Lightning, however he ended up paying for it with his life. The last notable to die was PullThePin at 4:26PM, he was Krazytrain's Right Hand Man and died a Street Boss as he attempted to both continue the family following his Boss’s death and bring the killers to justice. The Gazette have dug deep to uncover the reasons which sparked all this bloodshed and it all points to one incident. At 9:09AM on Friday, Kush - a Conceptualist Made Man, attempted to kidnap PullThePin, Krazytrain's second in command, and got shot in the process. As a result of this, Krazytrain threatened the whole Conceptualist group, not just Kush, and following on from these threats, the Conceptualists decided to take action. Kush himself was unavailable to comment on his actions at the time of press but the Gazette managed to secure an interview with Conceptualist Leader CarmineMillano as well as an interview with the son of Made Man White_Lightning to get a taste of events from both sides. Mr. Millano was reluctant to go into any great detail about the incidents on Saturday but he did have some strong messages to send out, not just to the remaining members of the fallen Bosses’ families, but to the community as a whole. He said, “Threats and attacks on our members will not be tolerated, let this be an example to everyone who thinks we aren’t a force to be reckoned with.” He was also quick to point out that the Conceptualists didn’t lose a single man in the shootout and that “it took less than 24 hours from the threat being made to all Krazytrain’s family being in the grave yard.” He openly admitted to the Conceptualists being the instigators of Saturday’s shootings and deaths but was quick to point out that they didn’t attack without good reason. He said, “Krazytrain threatened one of ours, I wasn’t going to let it happen so we killed him and all of his family which could be a threat.” He also commented on Krazytrain’s death specifically admitting that he was the one to personally fire the fatal shot saying, “I personally put the bullet in his head through 10 BGs.” When it was pointed out to him that some information had fallen into our hands proving that Kush, a known Conceptualist, had attempted to kidnap PullThePin, Krazytrain’s RHM at 9:09AM on Friday and had been shot in the process and that this may have been the real reason for Krazytrain’s threats Carmine said that he had no comment to make at this time on that particular incident. Finally he went on to add, “All I will be saying is Krazytrain got it into his head he was going to try to kill someone who I would gladly give my life to defend. Turns out Krazytrain paid the price with his life.” Could all of this bloodshed been avoided? Perhaps. From the evidence, it’s probable that the LVC were too quick to threaten and that the Conceptualists were too quick to resort to gunfire. To blame one group over the other in such circumstances would be foolish, however naturally all members of both sides to which we’ve spoken to have stood strong in the resolve that they were in the right. One can only hope that events such can only be avoided in the future without the need for bloodshed, especially on the scale witnessed recently. 'DALLAS RESIDENT ARRESTED FOR PUBLIC NUDITY ' A Dallas resident known only by the name of “Squire” was arrested by Police yesterday following a string of public nudity charges. The man, believed to be in his late 40’s, has allegedly been streaking at churches across the city, and in one of his worst offences, did something that can only be described as “defiling” the holy water in the font at St. Christopher’s. Police were at first stumped as to the identity of the nasty nudie, as he wore a balaclava in all raids. He was apprehended in his latest attack however, by an elderly lady who incapacitated him with her walking cane. Police say he sustained injuries to “the groin area” whilst displaying it to the lady. Sentencing remains a mystery, as the case will not be head until tomorrow, but the brutal nature of these crimes, coupled with the bare cheek of the offender are likely to be taken into account. Squire has claimed that he was told to streak on his latest visit to church by a potato shaped like Jesus. No confirmation of this could be received from the miracle potato featured a few issues back, as it is an inanimate object. 'THE REAL WORD ON THE STREET ' “The word on the street is… Aphex’s grey is looking a little shabby these days…” “The word on the street is… RTL’s beard was actually a failed Govermnent experiment to grow the perfect belly-button fluff…” “The word on the street is… Rosario_Porello isn’t quite as ‘all woman’ as she makes out…” “The word on the street is… Randle was seen peeking up Rosario’s skirt, ‘for research purposes’…” “The word on the street is… Squire was seen arguing with himself, again… He lost.” 'WHAT’S ON THE MENU? ' Restaurant and bar reviews by KingBenny Chicago, despite having many watering holes, does not have one that stands out, quite as much as Rosey’s Hideaway. The owner of this establishment is a well known lady, called Rosario_Porello. Located in the basement of a small corner store, the Hideaway offers a dimly lit, quiet atmosphere, perfect for those private “business” meetings. A large bouncer is present, to keep out unwanted trouble, and of course to check identification of all customers. Two bartenders are present to make and serve drinks, which range from liquor all over the world, to the three large taps of finely brewed beer, to the most common drink of choice, whiskey. Due to the recent success of her new bar, Ms. Porello has declared a “free drinks day” to all customers. Make sure to visit, next time you stay in the Windy City. Gabby's Café of New York is a superb coffeehouse I visited during my visit to the Big Apple. Located off a side street on 14th St., the café is a small simple place, good for quiet conversation and a hot cuppa. All kinds of coffee from around the world, and fresh baked pastries GabriellaSantini is the owner of the establishment, and runs a peaceful, quiet place with good coffee. 'EDITORIAL ' A Letter From The New Editor Dear Gazette readers, My name is John Milton. This is my first edition of the Gazette as Editor, and it was with great pride I took the post. Unfortunately, it was also with great sadness, due to the fate of the previous Editors. I would like to take this opportunity to personally thank LiaLombardi and DanteRossi for all they did for The Gazette, as well as the community as a whole. They will not be forgotten. Looking to the future though, I hope to maintain The Gazette’s reputation for integrity and excellent journalism, whilst bringing with me my own style of presentation and writing, the changes will be subtle and few, but I hope they will be for the best. I am particularly looking forward to working under Carmela De Angelis, her reputation precedes her as an Editor-in-Chief, but I am lucky enough to call her a friend, and I am sure I will enjoy my time here. Ultimately, I hope that you, the readers, can pick up the paper each edition, and be satisfied with the read. 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